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what
the
hell.
i sure know how to pick them, dont i?
as soon as i start to actually fall for someone, i find out that they like somebody else and that i dont have a snowball's chance in hell with them. then i get all depressed and i start feeling like crap again. it sucks. every person i have fallen for has just turned me down in one way or another, and do you know what i do? I COME BACK FOR MORE. i let myself get this way, and then i pay for it in the end. i cant take no for an answer once, but i can do it more than once. i just dont know when to quit. i cannot and will not take no for an answer. and that mentality keeps getting me hurt.
my friends keep telling me that you'll find the right person, you'll find the right person, and all this bullshit. no i wont. i probably already HAVE found the right person, but its never gonna happen, because when we dated, i got scared and chickened out on him. since then its been all down hill from there. i just keep falling for jerk after jerk after jerk and im sick of it. but i just cant stop. i keep picking assholes, and its probably never gonna stop. the only one that wasnt an asshole probably thinks i am because i chickened out and got scared for no damn reason! what is my goddamn problem?